Saturday morning is the first day of the rest of my life. I will wake up, no longer employed by IBM and the full time, totally committed owner of Kristina Young Photography. I could not be any happier or any more excited… but most of all, I am grateful.
The last few years have been an amazing journey of growth. When I completed my MBA, I knew I wanted to run my own business, I just had no idea what it would be. I had plans in place, spreadsheets ready, and thought “if I build it…” I hadn’t owned a camera since my beautiful EOS SLR was stolen from the back of my car in the early 90s. I loved that camera, but life got in the way and I never thought to replace it. Owen bought me an original Rebel DSLR before our wedding and I took it everywhere. I fell in love again. When I came home from Greece, everyone raved. What I failed to realize was that it is extremely difficult to take a bad photograph in Santorini… I was no expert, just a girl with a nice camera.
When Christofer came along, I again thought “I am a photographer.” Friends and family raved again. They always do. When I found an amazing resource board for new photographers, I was shocked when I didn’t get the positive reviews I was looking for. Couldn’t they see? What they saw was a mom with a nice camera shooting on Auto and using the pop-up flash. I started totally clean, I broke it down to the bare bones and I put on my hard hat and I learned. For the next 18 months or so I shot everything I could. I learned everything I could about light, post-processing, equipment, gear, style, composition… I thought I was ready.
I began to shoot sessions for friends. I realized that taking a few great photographers of my child was extremely different that shooting a gallery for a client. Dealing with dark houses, full sun, mixed light sources. It was one thing to sit in a friends house and get 5-10 keepers, quite another to be in a total stranger’s and ask have to ask a well-meaning Dad to stop yelling “cheese.” And so the learning continued. I learned how to eek out a gallery and correct it in Photoshop… then I learned how much better, easirer, and more true it is to get it right in the camera. I learned how to edit a session not in 6 hours, but in 2 hours. I learned how to get diversity from the dullest of conditions, how to shush a newborn, and how to position a self-conscious mom so she looks as beautiful to herself when she sees the image as she does to me when I capture it.
I could finally fill in the blanks to my plan. Build my brand. Search out my clients. I was ready. But the economy was not. You just don’t leave a 9-5er at IBM when the economy is at an all-time low. You don’t leave the benefits, you don’t leave the salary, you don’t leave the people. And so I stayed.
In the past 18 months, I short-changed IBM. I short-changed my amazing clients. I short-changed my husband. And probably my kids. But most important, I short-changed myself. I stopped working out, I let myself go and I got to the point where I don’t even recognize me in the mirror. I have worked more 70 hour weeks and pulled more all-nighters than I ever did during Babson exams. I distanced myself from friends because I just didn’t have the time. I made a lot of friends and family incredibly mad at me, and perhaps lost a few relationships because they couldn’t understand why I just didn’t have the time to get them their photographs. I disappointed a lot of people. I lost a lot of emails. I gave away a lot of freebies as “thank yous” for my disorganization. But I kept on going because I knew where I wanted to be.
But now I am ready.
With all that said, I wouldn’t be at this amazing place if Owen hadn’t stuck with me. There is a lot that can be said about the last few years of our lives… we’ve been married for only 4.5 years yet we’ve bought two homes, moved, had two children, I started my own business, left IBM, his company was bought, he had a tough two years and switched jobs and landed somewhere I think he can finally call home. We’ve raked leaves, planted gardens, cut down trees, bandaged up cuts and scrapes, taken temperatures, given baths, given hugs, given time-outs, slept through the night, been up every hour, lost some savings, gained some back, cooked a lot of meals, ordered a lot of take-out, and made some really truly and amazing friendships. It’s been really busy, and really chaotic, but I think it’s really good.
I also wouldn’t be at this amazing place without my family and friends (long-time, local and “imaginary”). I am truly blessed to have the people in my life that I do. I can’t say enough about them. My poor parents, and most of my friends, and my sister have listened to me drone on and on about stuff that isn’t even remotely interesting to them. For hours. Days. Weeks. Months. Probably thinking “will she ever just stop talking?”
My clients who are also my friends, patient, caring, and uncommonly beautiful. All of them. I can’t say it enough. I really love them. Really. I am sorry for any of you that ever fell through the cracks.
And finally my photog friends (the Photo-hoes). There really is not a better group of woman in terms of support, resources, advice, a dose of reality and a pat on the back. They know who they are.
So what about the running? What does that have to do with it? It dawned on me Saturday afternoon as I ran from the elevator to Melissa’s bridal suite that I hadn’t run for a job in so long. When I was managing Customer Service at Lotus back in the day, I was so excited and loved what I was doing so much that I would literally run from my office to the bathroom, back down the hall, over to someone else’s cube or office and then back to my own. I loved it and I didn’t want to miss a minute. People would tell me to slow down and I’d laugh saying “I can’t, there is just too much to do!” And it struck me on Saturday that I felt that exact same way. I was running to do something I loved and I never felt better.
Gorgeous!! Gorgeous!!
Gorgeous- love the lighting, the clean processing and the emotion you captured in these
lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely … time
great looking kids, wonderful pics kristina